Ashlee Simpson Disgraces Memory of the Oh-So-Classy ’80s
October 12, 2007 | Pop Culture
Ashlee Simpson celebrated her 23rd birthday with a precious ’80s-themed party at her parents’ house a couple weeks ago — and has now leaked the pictures for our viewing “pleasure.” Lucky us! BF Pete Wentz was the Prom King to Ashlee’s Prom Queen. Or was it the other way around? Regardless, I have to ask…
Did guys really wear ruffled suits in the ’80s? I went to the prom in the ’90s, myself, but I remember ’80s suits being of the Miami Vice white-and-pastel variety. As for ruffled suits… I believe my dad wore them in the ’70s. Was he just ahead of his time?
Um… and Ken Paves? Ashlee’s bangs need to be at least four inches higher, preferably with a claw. Of that, I am certain. And where are the shoulder pads? The acid wash? The headbands? The pale pink Wet ‘N’ Wild lipstick? The jelly bracelets…?
My God, the jelly bracelets!
This party was a disgrace. A DISGRACE, I say!
[R.I.P. '80s. You will forever be survived by my beloved Cabbage Patch Doll, Rochelle Michelle, and my crush on Kirk Cameron.]