Holly Madison Gets Her Hands on Hugh Hefner’s Baby Batter
January 18, 2008 | Pop Culture
As I’ve confessed on here before, I am an avid Girls Next Door fan. I am embarrassingly familiar with the grooming habits of Bridget’s dog, Wednesday, know that Holly is infatuated with Disney, and that Kendra’s laugh irritates me even more than people who don’t use turn signals. I’ve also read Bunny Tales so, based on my extensive secondary research, I can say with great certainty that Holly is a conniving wench. Team Bridget!
*AHEM* ANYway…
So it is with heavy heart that I report Holly and Hef were spotted in the waiting room of a Beverly Hills gynecologist who specializes in in-vitro fertilization. Holly has made no secret that she would like to get pregnant with her meal ticket, er… with Hef’s baby, and it looks like things are moving in that direction.
Poor Hef. Holly probably told him she wanted to baste a turkey for his birthday, and the guy couldn’t tell the difference between her pink taco and a birthday turkey. Well, at least the child will be born into a totally healthy family: an 81-year-old father who’s also in diapers, has two other families and a wife to whom he’s STILL married; two other “mommies,” one of whom is also still married and the other with an I.Q. level of a baby; AND a mother who shaved her nose, stripped her hair of all color and implanted cantaloupes into her chest just to catch daddy’s eye!
But whose family tree doesn’t read like that, really?
Oooohhh… I can’t wait to watch Wednesday in her first modeling shoot on Sunday!
Tags: Celebrities
Jane
says:
First, this is so f**king GROSS!
Second, this old ass goat doesn’t produce baby batter Candy, his is more like
baby oatmeal.
Ack!
midevil
says:
Is this the chick that has been in the mansion for quite some time now and jealously guards over him even when he’s got to initiate the new chicks?
Randi
says:
Oh My GOD! This is huge! I definately agree with you though, I’m more of a Bridget fan, and Holly has always seemed a little too into Hef for her own good.
Vern
says:
I realize Holly is trying to “inherit” a porn empire, but, yeesh, wouldn’t one be tempted to chew one’s leg off to get out of the trap?
midevil
says:
There are so many different ways to try and gain a wee bit of power in the patriarch that hey, if you have to let somebody who’s as old as your great-great-great grandfather sperminate you to do it, then so be it.
Vern
says:
The baby part doesn’t bother me-it’s the whole Harem or Mormon lifestyle. I imagine alot of it’s for show but it’s still creepy.
Jo Jo
says:
Hef, the Sperminator? Yuck.
Bee Hind
says:
What kills me is that if he weren’t worth billions of dollars,
these girls wouldn’t give him the time of day, much less sit on his lap half naked. The girls should be ashamed of themselves and Hugh ought to wake up and smell the toast burning. These girls do not find you the least bit sexy. They are showing you their tits because you have a lot of money in the bank. Period. If you were an anonymous old geezer in a nursing home, you’d be pulling your pud.
MsTriste
says:
Don’t you have to subscribe to the Playboy Channel to watch this? Have I been missing out all this time on another craptastic show?
Vern
says:
MsTriste-
It’s on E network, not the Playboy Channel. But I think they run the same episodes ALOT because it’s always the same one.
midevil
says:
I’m so glad I don’t watch tv, aside from the occasional rerun of That 70s Show.
MsTriste
says:
Sigh, thanks Vern. You know I’m adding that to my DVR today.
scott
says:
i hadn’t seen gratuitous cleavage since, well, hmmm maybe the last time i was here on your blog. i need a date, err with a playmate?! hehehe
librarian kathleen
says:
Eeeuuuwww. Ick.
However, you’ve got to hand it to
Hef. In what other country could
so homely a man build a multi-
million dollar empire based on
flesh, and reap personal benefit
from it day after day after day
after year after decade after
quarter-century afte….r……
Oh. O.K. Maybe the sheiks.
Yikes.